Autumn Fires

by Gustav Wied

Genre: Comedy
Setting: International
Format of Original Source: Play
Recommended Adaptation Length:

Candidate for Adaptation? Not Reviewed

EXCERPT:

KNUT. Don’t you know how old you are, sir?

HANSEN. Of course, I know.

HELMS. He’s ashamed to tell you. Ha, ha!

BUFFE. He’s afraid. Ha, ha!

HANSEN. Who’s afraid? [Reluctantly.] I’m only sixty.

THE OLD PEOPLE. “Only a boy.” “Not dry behind the ears.” “He’ll grow.” “Poor child.”

KNUT. That makes 453.

JOHNSTON [beats his chest]. I am seventy-five.

KNUT. That gives us 528 altogether.

HAMMER. Five hundred and twenty-eight! What a head the boy has on him.

BUFFE [to Bolling]. All together we are 528 years old.

BOLLING. What does it matter?

HELMS. We’d be older still if there weren’t a boy among us.

JOHNSTON. Yes, Hansen spoils it by being so young.

KRAKAU. You’ll have to hurry, Hansen.

HAMMER. Yes, so you will.

BUFFE. Why don’t you take something to make you grow?

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